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Zach and Lane

The last thing I expected was for Lane to slam his laptop lid shut the moment I walked into our living room after work.

“Are you looking at porn again?” I asked as I passed him on my way to the bedroom. “Because I already told you I’m not flexible enough to do that thing you like.”

Lane rolled his eyes. Five years married, and those gray eyes still had the power to weaken my knees. Even when he was clearly finding me ridiculous, like now.

I lived to see the smile on Lane’s face when he found me ridiculous.

“No, I’m not looking at porn. And you’re taking that one time completely out of context.”

I hid a smile and shrugged out of my suit jacket, longing to shed my work clothes and get into something more comfortable. Preferably something easy to get off, because I had plans for us tonight. Plans I’d been thinking about the entire Metro ride home, mostly involving sweet-talking Lane out of his jeans and t-shirt and doing fun and dirty things to him on the couch.

Still, despite my fantasizing, I couldn’t help but be a little curious about whatever it was Lane had been trying to hide on his laptop.

The laptop was still closed and on the coffee table when I returned to the living room in jeans a few minutes later. I hadn’t bothered with a shirt—that was part of my plan—and I was more than a little gratified when Lane’s eyes roamed over my chest and arms hungrily.

Five years of marriage, and we still had it.

I settled on the couch next to him and nodded at the still-closed laptop. “You’re not arguing political theory on social media again, are you? I can’t take another couple of weeks like the last time.”

Lane sighed. “I promise I’m not. Really, it’s nothing.” But he flushed, a tell-tale sign that was something was up.

An unfamiliar and highly unpleasant sensation crept into my gut, but I dismissed the thought as soon as it entered my mind. We were solid. The sparks were still there, as bright and hot as ever. We’d even started talking about putting a down payment on a house, now that I’d made equity partner at the firm. Whatever Lane was hiding had nothing to do with us. I was pretty sure.

Fuck, I hoped not.

Seeing my expression, Lane sighed again and opened the laptop lid. “It’s just something my mom sent me. You have to promise not to jump to conclusions.”

Huh. I leaned forward, already intrigued. The laptop came to life again and the screen flickered onto a serene gray and white website. My eyes went to the big, bold letters at the top. Family Planning for LGBT Couples.

Well, hell.

“You know how my mom is,” Lane said hurriedly, his eyes flicking to mine to gauge my reaction. “She happened to find the site and sent it to me. She’s just hoping for a grandkid. It doesn’t mean anything.”

Hell, my own mother would love another grandchild to add to the two Angela had given her. She and my father would be thrilled. And now that the idea was planted, I found myself…thinking about it.

Lane and I had never talked about kids. I couldn’t deny the idea made me nervous. But nervous-excited, not nervous-scared.

“What does it say?” I found myself asking.

Lane threw me a startled look. “I’d only just opened up the site.”

“But you must have looked at some of it.”

Lane shrugged, his flush creeping down to his neck. “I was curious, I guess.”

So was I. “Click there,” I said, pointing to one of the menu options about surrogacy.

Lane blinked and gave me a long look. He seemed nervous-excited too. My pulse sped up. God, were we really thinking about this? Were we ready for it? Was anyone? I wet my lips and leaned against Lane as he rested the laptop between us on our knees.

We pored through the site together, clicking menu items and scrolling through articles and following informational links. A long time later, we were jolted back to reality by my stomach growling loudly. When I glanced at the clock, I saw it was almost eight o’clock and we hadn’t eaten yet.

I blinked eyes that were dry from reading, and also newly wide-open to all the possibilities out there for us. If we decided it was something we wanted.

Was it something we wanted? That was the question, wasn’t it?

Lane called for Thai from the restaurant down the street, and I grabbed a shirt to pull on while we were waiting. Somehow my plans had taken a wild left turn, not that I was complaining. My brain was buzzing with everything we’d just read about.

I got out plates for the Thai food. “So, kind of interesting,” I ventured, trying to suss out what Lane thought about all of this.

Lane sat on one of the barstools on the other side of the island and rested his chin on his hand. “Yes,” he said cautiously, clearly trying to assess where I was with it too.

“I mean, we were already talking about looking at houses. We could at least check out the school districts too.”

Lane’s eyes widened. “Fuck, are we actually thinking about this?”

I leaned against the counter, my eyes resting on the person who meant more to me than anyone in the world. Who I couldn’t imagine my life without. Who I planned on growing old with. A life that could include kids and grandkids of our own.

“I think maybe I am,” I said, my eyes steady on his. “How about you?”

Lane released a long breath. His eyes didn’t leave mine either. “I think maybe I am too.”

Holy hell.

The doorbell buzzed, announcing the delivery of our food. I went to take care of that, and when I returned and put the bag of food on the island, Lane got up and put his arms around me. “Whatever we decide, just know there’s no one else I’d want to be a father with.”

My eyes pricked with emotion. I felt exactly the same way. My mouth found his, and when we finally came back up for air, I murmured against his lips, “I love you.” I’d never meant it more. “Fuck, are we really going to have a kid?”

Lane smiled. “I think we are.”

“You’ll be an amazing dad,” we said at the same time, and then burst out laughing.

Still shaking with laughter, I kissed him again, this person who I was maybe going to have a child with, a child who would no doubt grow up as kind and generous and brilliant as the man I loved.

I couldn’t imagine a better future for us.